Food, eating, self regulation 

Hi I hope I never get over, or too cynical for, trans women complimenting each other on here.

Couldn't ask for a better community to go through puberty through with.

The polite people that say "madam," or "miss," and wave me onto the bus before them are enough to make me almost briefly forget that stuff like that doesn't make up for structural sexism.

You'll rarely find a group of people happier to be able to cry than people starting estrogen HRT, and I think it's beautiful.

If we're mutuals you can compliment my tits all day long.

Hrt, sex 

It is a trip to experience both "I'm brand new at girl!" And "I am a 41 year old woman" (and the expectation that I perform the latter without having already gone through the former, long ago) simultaneously.

Having fat redistribute to my thighs and ass has been a real gam changer

So yeah, now I have the uncertainty and stresses of being a late-transitioning trans person, but they are distinct and understood and manageable.

In contrast, the inchoate, chronic stress of performing a gender that gave me social dysphoria *wasn't* easier, even despite being known and familiar. It added up year after year, and got harder to cope with, not easier.

In fact, I was coping all the time, and that wasn't living.

Thinking about how ten years ago I had somewhat of a detailed thought process about how if I was 15 years younger I might have transitioned—but at that point my choice was sealed and it was "easier" to stay a straight cis guy and "play the hand I was dealt."

Only to realize, after another decade of anxiety and uncrecognized effects of gender incongruity, how wrong I was.

The voice that suggests it's "easier" to be cis passing is ignoring all the consequences of accumulated gender incongruity.

I'm listening to Friends at the Table with my electrologist and explaining the concept and practice of role playing games as we go.

It is still better than talking local politics with her.

It is a little peculiar that the major "negative" side effects of HRT, i.e.:
• lower libido
• loss of muscle mass/strength
• reduced physical stamina

besides their other problems, seem to presume a certain baseline that at least in my case was unreasonable to assume.

If you're depressed and suffering from dysphoria, relief from those things could very well result in a net improvement in any or all of those things (as they did for me).


My life has already changed immeasurably in just the year since I figured out I'm trans, and entirely for the better. That's not really part of the dominant cultural narrative.

I was hesitant to tell my therapist I wanted boobs when I was on the path to getting my HRT prescription. I didn't want to be regarded as uh some bad thing that would preclude or delay me getting HRT.

So now I'll tell you all in confidence:

I really wanted boobs quite a bit.

Whipping Girl 

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