Anyway I think my point is that transness is about the freedom to express, present as, and be one's self. If you try to make it about being and presenting a certain way to first satisfy some socio-political aim above the individual's own sense of gender you aren't ending gender you're just creating a different system of gender and gender expectations. It misses the entire point.

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I guess connected with this is that I am non-binary, and happily tell anyone when it comes up—even though I don't aim anywhere but some degree of femme for my presentation. I don't owe anyone androgyny or genderfuck. I present how I present for myself.

I do my activism and nonbinary advocacy through other means.

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Sometimes I need to remind myself of this, but I think other people need it more often: I'm trans for me, to be more myself and more comfortable in the world. Not for anyone else, and certainly not to achieve a political aim, like destroying the gender binary.

Political implications and consequences are inevitable, and a political purpose can be good and necessary—I actively participate in undermining the gender binary, even if not with my presentation, which is FOR ME.

I will see you in another life, when we are both girls

Who can forget Proust's literary masterpiece about transitioning late in life

Wrote something for @AudreyJune 's zine about how much fighting I have to do, and as if on cue, gotta argue with my health insurance about improperly denied claims again.

"I'm a girl?"

"Yes, you are."

"Wow! How did this happen?"

"Through a series of deliberate choices you made."

"Wow that's amazing! What hath science wrought?"


The deep, ineffable structure of bureaucracy can only guarantee this NEVER happens if you actually *tried* to change your name from Tuttle.

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Trans life axiom: No matter how many layers deep you dig in any bureaucracy, there's always at least one layer deeper that still has your old name.

Early trans feels that I studiously disregarded: identifying with Jennifer Connelly's character in Labyrinth

When you put on a dress you've had for a year and it looks way better on you than when you first got it because your body has the correct silhouette for it now >>>

Grs surgeon shopping: Nicholas Kim 

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Grs surgeon shopping: Nicholas Kim 

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Grs surgeon shopping: Nicholas Kim 

Needles (not in use) 

Hi I'm [person I've met before], I didn't know you worked at [workplace]! How long have you been there.

I've been there ... a while. I am [role]

Oh, what happened to the guy that had that job?


Surgery consult in one week. What questions should I ask / did you wish you had asked?

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